How To Take a Fall and Keep Your Dignity

I'm in a rush as I run out the door.  It's the end of the day, end of the week and I'm getting out of the work place.  I've got a smile on my face and a heavy backpack strapped over my shoulders.  My arms are full with a stool in one hand and loose papers in the other.  Resting on my forearms a bag of fruit is balanced delicately between my biceps.  One problem, my shoelace has come untied.  I'm about to discover this in a spectacular way.  

This long strand that binds the shoe to my right foot is always coming undone.  Untethered, as I step to the Jeep the lace ends are whipping around like errant unattended fire hoses under high pressure.  They are now wedged between my left shoe and the pavement.  My right foot can do nothing but dangle motionless in the air for a fraction of a second.  An important footfall has been missed.  That's when my still moving hips tilt forward losing altitude.  My whole body starts leaning too far past my feet.  I feel like a falling pine tree cut from its roots with nothing left to do but hit the earth.  The shoe lace situation has my complete attention.

I think, “Damn shoe lace.”  Followed by,”I could die.”  The shock of being out of control makes me laugh.  I hop forward on my left leg struggling for balance and to dislodge the shoe lace.  I’m laughing, almost hysterically now, my freed right foot is moving to resume its job keeping my face off the pavement.  My shoulders lurch forward causing the heavy back pack to crash into my medulla.  Then I remember the stool and the papers in my hands. Both are hurling from my grip and away from me.  The bag of fruit shoots forward like a projectile from a trebuchet.   I arch my back and thrust out my arms to achieve some sort of desperate equilibrium.  Unfortunately I overcompensate and the weight on my back forces my shoulders to fall back and my chest to thrust forward.  With the shoe lace whipping around my ankle both legs are in steady motion as my momentum crashes forward.  I’m trying to prevent a hard fall.   I don’t know if my legs can move quick enough to regain composure and prevent a catastrophe.  They keep pumping as if they belonged to a half back breaking through a defensive line for a touchdown.  I feel the stress on my knees.

The bottom edge of the toe of my left shoe clips the quickly approaching curb.  At this point my feet are air borne.  My body is becoming horizontal.  The back pack shifts to the side which causes me to spin in midair.  My arms thrust out and upward like a rock star singing a final encore.  I’m laughing and shouting, “look out!”  I fly over the curb landing squarely on my keester.  My waist is bent 90 degrees which brings my outstretched legs up in the air above my torso and forming a “V” from my crotch to my shoes.   Spinning on my bottom in loose gravel I feel like a misguided break dancer in a rap song.  My legs and arms are still thrust out and extended apart. How can I be spinning on my butt like this?

Finally, it's all over.  In the aftermath, I look around to see if anyone was watching.   It appears no one witnessed this amazing vault into the unknown.  My back is resting on the heavy back pack.  For some reason my legs and arms are still open and extended in a “V” shape.  I'm laughing because evidently I haven’t broken any bones and I cant' figure out how to get up.  Papers are all over the pavement and the gravel.  The stool is still rolling on it's side to the lowest part of the manicured lawn in front of the hotel facade.

I decide to roll onto my stomach.  I push up with my palms and rest my bottom on my calves.  With effort I place the soul of my left shoe on the ground.  Squatting and balancing myself enough to bring the other shoe forward, I tie the miscreant lace.  With caution I stand up, dusting off my pants.  A final look around shows no one in the parking lot, but I’m hearing laughter.  Oh, it’s me laughing.  Not a soul was a witness to this mishap.

After picking up papers I corral scattered fruit back into the plastic supermarket bag.  The stool came to rest against a pine tree where I grab it.  My keys!  Where is my key chain?  It was wrapped around my right pinky.   I guess it flew out of my grasp in the mayhem. There!  A squirrel is fussing at it.  Evidently the key chain crashed into the tree trunk the little rodent was climbing.  He’s still gripping the tree and griping at the keys at the base of the tree trunk below him.  This animal is probably the only witness to my lesson in harried misdirected equilibrium.

It was a fall.  Embarrassment and feeling ridiculous is part of overcoming the event.  Falling is not a condition though it can create an affliction.  There is dignity in moving on and renewing self-respect.  I am not the fall, I am a survivor.  

I gather my things and throw them in the back of the jeep.  At last my weekend has started.

A Winner

OK, I have the lottery ticket in front of me.  The numbers are emblazoned in my memory.  I’ve checked the numbers four times and I’m checking them again.  Numbers don’t lie.  I bought a Powerball ticket with a Powerplay option.  If I match most of the numbers the amount of money I win will, I hope, at least double.  But I don't need the Powerplay today.  The outcome of check number five is like the previous four.  I matched every number.  I have it!   I have it!  I’m a winner!

The lottery ticket is in my possession.  The numbers drawn today that match my ticket are  04   07  33  44  47 and the Powerball number 34.   Yep, excitement! I can't breath. I can't think. I don't know who I am.  But I have lottery numbers that match my lottery ticket!  Like money in the bank.  Money, money, money!

I want to tell someone.  Wait, I have to be careful.  Who can I tell that won't ask me for a loan?  I know, I'll tell Turtle.  We've been friends since grade school.  I know things about him for which the statutes of limitations have not expired.  Yeah, I'll tell him. He'll keep a secret or else.  Or else I won the lottery!  Whoot!  Yippi!

So, what do I do?  Right now I'm going to cruise the neighborhood. It's two in the morning and the subdivision is snoring, except for lottery winners and insomniacs.  At this stop sign I'm going to check the numbers again.   I'll get my smart phone and check the Powerball website.  The numbers are there, all aligned like the stars positioned on my birth chart.  Yep, my stars and the lottery numbers 04 07 33 44 47 and that beautiful Powerball number 34.  That's what the numbers are and as I check the numbers on my lottery ticket I am not disappointed!   I’ve checked it six times and the numbers have not changed or disappeared.  This is a good sign.

What should I do with all the money?   Invest?  Yes.  Enjoy?  Yes. Subvert lowly capitalist pigs who have been manipulating my pathetic life with low wages and high anxiety?  Yes!  Yes!  Yeah, I will hire “people,” the kind of people who find out about people. I will have them find out about these lowly capitalist pigs.  I am empowered, vindicated.   I am nourished at the well of contentment and blessings.  Yep, I am blessed!

My job is obsolete.  I never have to face $10.50 an hour again. Never have to worry about choosing to pay either the car note or the mortgage for lack of money.  Never again do I have to work in the hospitality industry which is, by the way, a very inhospitable place to work.  I am on the other end of the hospitality curve.  The resorts I vacation at will change their policies to fit my whims.  I’m going to have a lot of whims.   I'm in charge now.  Management will vie for my money and I will make them crawl on their belly to get it. Abuses at their hands are indelibly etched on my mind, but that's all behind me now.  My money will eke a reckoning.

The rules have changed. What governed the making of my self image has fallen away.   I will have to learn who I am without the harsh realities of poverty shackled to me.  I can go anywhere I want whenever I want.  I can live where ever I want.   I can create a business and hire people.  I can help friends and loved ones.

Slow down.  Take a deep breath of Freedom.  The concepts of “freedom” and “free will” have a totally different meaning now. I have the where-with-all to do anything I want. To change my environment in fundamental ways and with ease is awesome.

My goals were always in the arts.  I write songs and scripts for TV and movies.  Writing projects have been limited by what little time and energy I had away from work collecting a paycheck.   Setting goals with limitless finances at my reach creates different stresses.  From now on my goals will be influenced by what's most important to me.  How much do I really want to achieve?  How do I blend a healthy lifestyle with hanging at the beach and chasing women?

Interests will now compete for time and energy with people in my world needing help. My boundaries have always been a j-o-b. Earning a living has set the tempo to everything in my life.  I have to set my own boundaries from this point on.  Boundary building might evolve somewhat painfully.  I hope not.

Magically, I am a family elder.  It doesn’t matter how old I am.   Money does things like that.  I can't save everyone, but I am in a position to help.

First, I must sojourn to the nearest Powerball office and show my free pass to the world.  A piece of paper with six wonderful numbers.  Maybe I should hire a lawyer to collect the winnings, or maybe a priest.  Which one is more trustworthy?  I’m too excited! I’ll collect my winnings myself.

I need a CPA!  This person will guide me through my financial ignorance.  I will construct financial instruments that will protect my money.  I will have shelters for investments.  I will proudly pay my fair share of taxes.  I don’t care how many tax cuts the Bozos in Washington want to give me.  I am a financial force and I will donate time and money.  That’s what responsible people do.  I’ll be a caretaker of the earth.  Look out, corporate bad guys and lawless law enforcers.  I am Superman watching out for the little guy. I got big muscles and even bigger reasons to keep you under scrutiny.  So don’t piss me off.

I am a winner.  I have money.  I have escaped obscurity.  No longer lashed to a corporate oar, I am not a number.  I have a name and it starts with Mr. and ends with Somebody.

OK, I'm Dead. What Now?

What is death?  It is the transfer of physical assets to Invisible commodities.  It is the best way to dodge taxes and all other debts. Take your rewards (such as capital gains) from the visible and transfer them into invisible capital.  It could be similar to exchanging currency from Deutschmarks to Greenbacks.  This might take faith. Do you have any?  Faith is a lot like confidence.  Not every reward in life can be exchanged for invisible assets.  It's a matter of how well you handle risk?  All capital is accrued in the physical life that has just ended.  Even if your monogram is RM and you own just about every kind of media outlet in the world, you will be dumber than the dumbest soul in the Invisible.  You have just started over.

The big question, is there really anything after life?   Is it good, bad, nice or not so nice?  My money is on yes to all of the above.  The Invisible really does exist.  It might be very much like it is here, though there are questions.  I mean, will you reap what you sew? What can be sewn and how can it be reaped?  Are there any penalties for an early harvest?  Can you withdraw capital from fields sewn by someone else?  There might be different answers in the Invisible.  Remember, greed has its limitations when you’re dead.

Death is an entirely different investment scheme, but with similarities to life.  Like life, there are front-end-loaded, back-end loaded and no-load approaches.  The more you bring to the table the easier it is for the long term.  The invisible is very big on the long term.  If you don't like keeping assets tied up for long periods maybe you should consider opting out of death.   Can death be opted out of?  What is the alternative?  Always consider risk management - how much can you get away with?  Where can you hide?  A better question is, how much do you want to give – I mean, really give?

If enlightenment has come in the pages of a book or from a vision, you now have insider information.  When invisible you will want to create a splash.  Build a frenzy, create a bubble in the Faith market. The bigger the bubble the higher the price, right?   Faith is the foundation and the currency of the Invisible.  It is the light and the redemption.  It is what buys everything invisible.  You can cash in big on faith futures, maybe even short sell your liabilities that used to be assets in life.  Only free will is your limiter.  How to market liabilities?  As always, sell to someone who knows less than you and is searching.  Careful.  The people who run the Invisible know every angle, have worked every con and have taken that knowledge and refined it and edified it.   Profit from your every effort by scrutinizing the details and learning from it.

Physically and emotionally speaking, life is too demanding for most people - too hard and too mean.  There must be something better. Hence the risks you take in this life directly effect the capital you have to invest with when you get to that Invisible Place.  So what are you betting on?  What do you believe in?  What do you want to become?  How much capital do you have to invest with?   Did you Ponzi?  Did you get Ponzied?  Did you smile?  Did you have fun? These are important questions.

In the Invisible World priorities are different.  There is no physical  body to feed or get sick.  The entire concept is an enigma.  It's important to have a plan or at least a vague notion of what the Invisible is.  At least this is a starting point.  You can always change your beliefs.

Why The Moon Must Leave

In the beginning - after the “big bang;” gases were swirling, space particles were zipping through the universe and life was exploding.  A tiny source of energy emerging was the sun.  Its gravity was intensifying and heat was rising.  There was light.  As the sun matured it pulled together the planets, asteroids and those pesky harbingers of doom and grace, comets.  The earth in this concoction of light and gravity was spinning and gaining mass.

One day (actually before there were days) very early in unrecorded time, a big rock hit the earth.  The violent collision made the earth a roiling blob of magma.  So enormous was the cataclysm that the combined fusion of the big rock and the earth created a lopsided spinning lump that split in two.  The smaller part (the new moon) began to orbit the larger part (the new earth).  Two turbulent, fiery revolving blobs shook their figurative fists at one another.  The attraction was undeniable and at first the distance between the two was very, very close.  The earth's gravity trapped the moon.  But the orbit of the moon created a force that drew away from the earth ever so gradually.

As everything began to cool little chunks of space ice fell on earth, melted and began to pool.  The moon pulled at the water and the sun baked the air.  Little amoebas began to dance around in the wet stuff.  Carbon dioxide, oxygen, clouds, lightning, rain and wind became a potent brew that spawned bigger and bigger creatures.  Pretty soon, that is expeditiously in geological time, came humans, agriculture and space aliens.

None of this would have happened so easily if there had been no super collision and the moon was not up there.  The moon stabilized the earth's rotation and helped provide the changing seasons.  The centrifugal force of the orbit around the earth caused the moon to move away from the earth slightly and continuously.  When the moon pulled away just enough it periodically eclipsed the sun and the sun eclipsed the moon.  That's when the moon really got powerful.  It gave humans an easy out.  When a calamity would befall us we could blame it on the solar eclipse.  After all, if it made the birds circle in the air (lost without the light) until the sun would return, it must be powerful enough to mess-up meager humans.

The earth's shadow can be seen on the moon.  Lunar cycles march through the calendar and command our attention.  The moon lights the night for wild dogs to howl at and for humans to behold.  Poets write love sonnets and astronauts fly missions to it, yet it’s all still a big mystery.  But from the beginning the moon was only a temporary companion.  Its orbit was always widening, its influence weakening.  Like lovers so close but drifting so slowly apart until they are indeed on their own.  No gravity can keep it close.  No more tugging at the tides.  No more wailing at the moon.  No more poets waxing eloquently or waning horribly about the moon.

When it finally goes it will be an ambassador of the earth.  Like the Interstellar Missions of Voyager with effigies of us and messages from earth in fifty-five languages, the moon will show the universe what we are like.  It is so much a part of us.  Our foot prints are on it.  Before it disappears who knows what other parts of us will be there, like the lunar landing sites.   Inevitably the moon will finally wander away.

The sun will spend its hydrogen and become a red giant (twelve times as big as it is now).  It will render the earth into a cinder and then implode to become a white dwarf.  It will lose it’s gravitational grip on the planets and the comets.  The solar system will be adrift in the dark as the moon was, perhaps finding some other super-hot gaseous mass to orbit and take meaning from.

So the lessons will be learned and the stars will burn out and the creatures will return to dust.  As humanity evolves, the moon will always be a solitary figure, reflecting the suns light and perhaps giving us hope in the darkest moments.

The Turning Point

A turning point is a place where what is cannot return to what was. It is a shift in thought and action.  A dramatic turning point we experience every twenty-four hours is the transit from light to dark. Fearing the sun would never rise again was so overwhelming that it fomented human sacrifice.  That was a potent turning point on multiple levels; dark to light, life to death, despair to hope, and destruction to restoration.

We are not always in sync with turning points.  If you are unready for the shift in consciousness or the change in politic, the transition will be difficult.  Civil wars have been fought because of this. Homelands and loved ones can disappear in violent temblors and washed away by horrible tsunamis.  Is your will strong enough to keep you focused on a plan to keep you safe during such vicissitudes?

The key word to remember is “resilience.”  If the turning point is not flowing with you, just pretend you are flowing with the turning point.  American politicians are adept at this.  When the tide of popular opinion turns against their “platform,” they pretend not to rebuild it.  They inform constituents thus, “there has been no change in my position, just a misunderstanding of my platform" (and the words that built it).  Reconfiguring his thoughts to form slightly different ideas that are more in line with the shift in attitude, the leader has made a deft adjustment.

A good movie will tell a story with layers of turning points that produce tension.  Odom is a champion athlete who loses his left leg in a traffic accident.  To survive, he and his small child beg on the streets.  People know him but from where?  His condition makes him unrecognizable.  His pride will not allow him to be remembered. Odom sleeps in a cardboard box under a culvert below the stadium where his athletic prowess once was dazzling.  His coach tried to keep in touch but drifted away.   His mother is distraught and doesn't know what to do.  Odom has fallen beneath the sidewalk that has become his home. But there is a woman who still loves him and knows where to find him.  This is a true story.  Turning points are not for the delicate.

The arrival of a newborn is a magical beginning.  Everyone in the family is changed.   All must adjust to a new personality and a different perspective.  Each person's position in the family is in transit.  A new whole, a new family is created.  

At the opposite end of life, death is jarring and seems sudden. The questions it foists upon us individually are awesome.  What happened?  Where did he go?  Will I be next?   The transitions at birth are stripped away when a family member dies.  There is a gap in the familial fabric.   Again everyone considers their position and their mortality.  The turning point has been met with a crushing realization that life is frail.

The discovery that earth, and all that populate it, is not the center of the universe has inflicted a diabolical blow to the human ego.  We should consider unthinking this thought and restoring the turning point back to where it was before Galileo.  Abolishing this idea would enhance sleep patterns and restore our self worth.  It could be a new chapter in the Book of Denial that says humans lived amongst dinosaurs and the earth is only seven thousand years old.  If we can rethink Pluto and revoke its planetary citizenship, why not give ourselves back the center spot in the universe.  Life would be easier.