What if paper bags had never been invented and the idea of a pouch had never occurred to anyone? What if the necessity of a container, a receptacle to carry “stuff” in, was beyond human comprehension? If the discovery of pockets on trousers had been delayed to the next breath of Brahman, what would we do? What if the fundamental laws of physics dictated that the common paper sack destroyed the delicate balance between gravity and inertia?
If all this were to occur numerous burdens would befall us and keep us frustrated. For instance money, both currency and coin would be in hand all day long. There would be no place to store it. We carry money to buy coffee or a snack, but our hands would turn black. A brief case, a suit case would not exist anywhere. No way to carry documents and no room to stow a book. Anything of importance would have to be committed to memory. Every record would have to be kept in our brain. No wonder a hand shake once was suffice when entering into an agreement. Guilds would grow up around the spoken word. Elders would have apprentices whose only job would be to learn how to remember all the important events in the history of his clan. All of this because the universe will not let us invent the paper sack!
There are similar instances in the universe as we know it. The Inca Empire did not know or use the common wheel, yet a child's toy from that culture had wheels. They didn't comprehend its use or perhaps they could not be bothered. I'll bet they used bowls, gourds and pouches expertly. Their empire would not have grown without them. When Columbus first arrived in the new world the natives could not see three ships nearing their shores. Native American awareness did not include the possibility of ocean going vessels. If you don’t know then you don’t know to look. Perhaps we would not miss a paper bag or acknowledge its form if we never knew what it was or how handy it could be.
So we stand on the sidewalk with computer manuals stuffed under our arms and maybe enough money for lunch clinched in our palms. The lap top would have to be pressed between our clutched fist and chest. To have a conversation on a cell phone while we are walking would be impossible. First, everything in hand would have to be put on the ground to free up finger space for the phone. Where would we store this phone? Well, between our butt cheeks? That might render a conversation smelly. But, wait! Without a haversack to free up our pitiful life would we even have electronics at all?
If the concept of a receptacle was in the realm of the unknowable, how would we gauge our ability to fight? Successfully fighting his way out of a paper sack is a milestone in a young man's life? There are other limitations. How very sad never to have a sack lunch. There would be no way to hide a bottle of booze without a brown paper bag. Indeed there would be no bottle to store the booze in. Paper sacks are a known relief for hyperventilation, but not in a bagless society. Passing out might be the only remedy.
Corn and potatoes would have to be in the ground and nearby because fresh produce does not transport well without containers. Little “victory” gardens would sprout up in back yards as in the days of WWII. With care and a plan enough fruits and veggies could grow for the family. In such a bizarre no-bag universe there would be no pots and pans for cooking. Build a fire under a flat rock and cook in the back yard, I guess. There would have to be a loophole in the cosmic rules somewhere for a plate, I hope. Probably bowls would be impossible.
All this confusion about life with no bags is unsettling. I’m going shopping. We have sacks in this universe and I’m going to fill several full with whatever looks good. I'll buy stacks of paper sacks. I’m going to put them in a safe place, in case universal laws shift suddenly and the sack disappears from consciousness.
No comments:
Post a Comment