Dead Elk Status For Children

We want to give "dead elk" status to children in Arizona.  I live in AZ and I must say we are an enlightened crowd.  We live by rules handed down by men who lived here long before us - pioneers who should have known better.  The following are a sampling of those rules.   

Rule 1:    Carry deadly force close to you like most folks carry their cell phones.
Rule 2:    Keep a list of reasons to apply this force.  Amend it vigorously with new reasons.     
Rule 3:    Remember the location of anything with a pulse.  This might take every waking hour, since everything that breaths has a pulse.  However, your efforts will be rewarded when you discover a "good enough" reason from Rule 2 to render a nearby pulse to cease.
Rule 4:     Expedition of Rule 3 will make you feel powerful, God-like. 
Rule 5:     Remember that using deadly force is an affirmation of all that is American, like the buffalo and the Middle Class.  
Rule 6:     Helping the living to die validates our ability to cause change that will bring in the new world order.  A place where freedoms are best kept secret in case the law decides what you're building in your garage is way too deadly, even for Arizona. 


After all, we are supposed to leave the planet different, proving that we spent time here.  There is no law saying you have to, but why not really live free and keep your child from dancing around unrestrained in the bed of a speeding pick-up.  Maybe that child will still be alive upon arriving home.

Applying "Dead Elk" status to children is an attempt to keep them safer on the roads (children, that is).  It is unlawful to carry a dead elk in the back of a pick-up in AZ without it being tied down.  So a clever legislator decided, “Hey if it's OK for a dead elk why not tie down our kids in the back of the pick-up.”  Eureka!  That way when they wiggle they won't fall out of the truck.  But, here's where it gets interesting.  Certain people have decided it is an infringement of their personal liberty if the government says a child has to be secured in the back of a pick-up truck.

No, it's an infraction of my pocket book.  What if that child falls out of said pickup and sustains life threatening injuries that cost hundreds of thousands of dollars.  With the economy the way it is, there is a good chance the parents of this child will have no health insurance.  If they do have health insurance, there is probably a very low cap on what it covers.  Lets face it, the good governor of AZ has gutted AHCCS (state run health insurance), so the price of caring for this pathetic little kid will be coming out of my pocket (and yours) in the form of higher health care fees and higher drug costs, higher everything.

But, we wouldn't want anyone to feel confined by the government.  By all means let children run amuck in the back of a pick-up.  If there is an accident maybe it will be quick and painless.  Better for their personal freedom and I'll hope for the best.